


ceiling spiders and clowns in the mirror

by wisterispidey



Series: irondad bingo: halloween edition [9]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: BAMF Tony Stark, Gen, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Precious Peter Parker, i am also alive too lets get this bread, idk what this is ngl it’s cool tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-24
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2020-12-24 01:33:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21091178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wisterispidey/pseuds/wisterispidey
Summary: A week.Their little prank and scare war lasted for a week before everyone decided to stage an intervention.(bingo prompt: Tony or Peter trying to scare one another)





	ceiling spiders and clowns in the mirror

**Author's Note:**

> literally haven’t posted in so long life’s been kicking my ass rip — but i’m pretty much caught up now whew, expect an income of fics this week i got my shit together. also!! happy ace awareness week to all you lovely people <3 unfortunately, i don't think i'll be able to post anything for that this week (i have a later work prepared for something sjsj) but my love goes out to everyone all the same, kick ass out there you rock <3

To be honest, Peter didn’t mean to do it.

He was just _tired._

Tired of school, tired of homework, he was just tired of everything and all he wanted to do was sleep.

But today was a lab day and even though he wanted nothing more than to just face plant onto his bed, with some random movie playing in the background, he couldn’t just ditch Mr. Stark like that, and no matter how many times the man tried to deny it, Peter knew Mr. Stark liked him coming over.

Or at least that’s what he hoped so anyway.

When Peter entered the familiar lab, greeting a soft hello to FRIDAY, Mr. Stark was nowhere in sight.

Weird, he’d usually be here by now, looking over one of his schematics on the holotable or fiddling with his latest idea.

“Hey FRI, where’s Mr. Stark?” asked Peter, throwing his backpack on the couch.

“Boss is currently in a meeting Peter, he should be here within an hour and he sends his apologies,” the AI responded, her soft voice washing over Peter.

Peter nodded, a yawn escaping him as his eyes continued to droop further. A thought ran through his head, the sudden urge to just stop moving settled comfortably in his mind.

Tired, doe eyes scanned the tall ceiling of the lab, his eyes unconsciously straying to one of the corners. 

The lights were only slightly dimmer in that area compared to the rest of the room around it and bingo that was the perfect place.

He glanced up around the high ceiling of the lab, his eyes straying to one of the corners.

Before Peter could even process what his hands were doing, he had swiftly webbed together a makeshift hammock, courtesy of his webshooters.

Peter yanked a pillow from the nearby couch and easily attached himself to the wall, climbing towards his new bed.

A little nap never really hurt anyone, right?  
__

Tony walked into the lab, his eyes immediately scanning the room for a certain Spider-Kid but he was nowhere in sight.

The kid’s backpack was thrown haphazardly on the leather couch, a few sheets of homework and scrap paper scattered on the floor.

Typical.

FRIDAY had told him that Peter had arrived around an hour ago, and yet there wasn’t any sign of the actual kid except for his belongings.

A sense of dread immediately ran up his spine, a rush of protectiveness and something else he couldn’t place his finger on clouded his mind.

A part of Tony knew that something else was probably paternal but it’s not like he was going to being saying that aloud anytime in the near future.

“Pete? Hey kid,” he started, “it’s Iron Man, you know, your favorite Avenger?”

Usually that would get an argument out of Peter, and then the kid would go off on a rant about how _no, Mr. Stark, no offense, but Tony Stark’s my favorite Avenger, Iron Man’s cool and all, but he’s no Tony Stark._

This time he received no answer except the unfamiliar silence occupying the lab (usually there was laughter or Tony and Peter rambling about science talk only the two of them understood), what if something had happened to Peter while he was stuck at that boring meeting.

Scenarios of Peter bleeding and unconscious in an alley because he had been injured again flashed in his mind, bringing back memories to that mime incident.

“Parker, this isn’t funny,” he warned, because if this was the kid’s idea of funny, they were gonna have a serious discussion after this.

Peter was in Tony’s blind spot, still curled up on his web hammock, dozing off while Tony was in distress, wild curls sticking up as he subconsciously drew closer to whoever that voice belonged to.

Something about it was familiar, it was comforting, warm, safe, but why did the person sound so worried?

All Peter knew was that it was not good because that person deserves all the happiness in the world.

So, Peter kept moving farther and farther off the hammock and onto the ceiling instead, the only thing preventing him from falling was his natural stickiness.

The only issue with his sticking powers was that they didn’t work as well when he was asleep (Peter didn’t know that) and even they couldn’t stop him from falling from the ceiling.

“Peter? Come on kid, don’t make me call May— holy fucking shit!”

Tony could see his life flash before his eyes as he whirled around, looking at what—or rather who—had fallen from the ceiling.

Peter landed in a heap from somewhere behind Tony, a small _oof_ emitted from him as he blinked sleepily at the man, dopey smile on his face.

“Hey, Mr. Stark,” a yawn interrupted him, “what’s up?”

Tony blinked, could you believe this kid?

“What’s up, Pete? I’ll tell you what’s up, you were.”

Peter looked at him carefully, still confused until oh yeah, he was sleeping on the ceiling.

“Come on Mr. Stark, don’t tell me you were scared that bad.”

Tony wouldn’t admit it, but he had been scared, scared that something bad had happened to his kid and he wasn’t there to protect him as best as he could when Peter was still out and about, helping one person at a time.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he sniffed, looking away from the kid so he couldn’t see the fear in his eyes.

“Are you sure? I heard that might be bad for your heart,” a mischievous smile appeared on his face, “and given how old you are, you know?” 

Tony was ready to wipe that stupid smile on his face, _him_, old? Absolutely unacceptable, he would’ve disowned the kid by now if he didn’t lo—like him that much.

And maybe Tony was being a little petty, but did the kid really expect to get away with calling him old?  
__

When Peter got home to the Parker apartment, everything seemed fine. 

May was already home, attempting to make dinner in the kitchen and Peter had a feeling they’d need to order takeout tonight.

“Hey honey, how was Tony’s?” his aunt called from the kitchen, mixing what Peter assumed was supposed to be sauce.

“So cool, May—I scared Mr. Stark too,” he cackled and May snorted.

Peter headed to his room, nearly tripping over the pile of clothes on his door. When he looked around his room, he froze.

There were spiders _everywhere_ he could see—hairy, black tarantulas, shiny black widows and way too many beady eyes—the worst part was that Peter couldn’t tell if they were real or not.

His Spidey Sense wasn’t tingling so they probably weren’t but they were still spiders and he hadn’t exactly had the best track record when it came to spiders.

Peter quickly backed out of his room, slamming the door shut before scrambling over to May, who was disposing the failed mystery sauce in the trash.

“May, we gotta find a new apartment,” Peter pleaded, a shiver ran up his spine at the sight of all those spiders.

“Why sweetheart?”

Peter stared at her like his life depended on it, which it kinda did because spiders were _nasty_, “There’s spiders all over my room May, it’s been infected.”

“Oh, so that’s why Tony had sent Happy over here earlier,” she laughed, eyes twinkling with mirth as Peter’s jaw dropped.

Oh, it was so _on._  
__

Peter felt bad for doing this to Mr. Stark but he wasn’t the one that had to sterilize his entire room so it was kinda his fault.

Mr. Stark had invited Ned and MJ over for dinner because _I need to get to know your nerd friends better so I can get blackmail on you._

Peter threw a rag at him when he said that, hiding his smile behind a cough.

He walked through the familiar lab doors, laughing at Ned’s starstruck reaction to the lab.

“Dude, _dude_, do you see the holotables, holy shit,” Ned breathed while MJ was still carefully examining the lab equipment.

“Where’s Stark,” she asked, bored as usual but Peter didn’t miss the way her eyes lingered on Tony’s notes about using the arc reactor for clean energy in cars.

Or the way her hair looked extra curly today, and he was pretty sure her jacket was new.

“FRI?” he prompted, grabbing a granola bar he left yesterday.

“Boss is currently asleep after working for three days straight,” the AI sniffed (could AIs do that?) and Peter grinned as an idea formulated in his head.

“Okay people,” Peter started, “last week Mr. Stark pranked me because he thinks he’s funny and now I need help.”

Both his best friends looked at him in interest, a small smile on MJ’s face while Ned perked up from behind the lab table where DUM-E stood by him.

“Here’s the plan.”  
__

As much as Peter loved Mr. Stark, he really should’ve known better than to attack him with spiders—and he couldn’t let him get away with this either.

MJ and Peter quietly walked into the common room, Peter holding back his laughter at the sight of Mr. Stark sprawled on the floor.

“MJ, do you have the—” she shouldered pass him, a bag of face paint in one hand while the other held a variety of different brushes.

“I got this, Parker, you and Nedward go handle whatever,” she huffed, already painting Mr. Stark’s face.

How did he not wake up from that?

“Ned, where’s that mirror?” Peter asked, quietly climbing up the wall while Ned snatched the mirror from MJ’s backpack—he didn’t know why she had it, but he wasn’t gonna question it either.

Peter hung the mirror from the ceiling, making sure that it was directly above Mr. Stark’s face—he knew it was kinda mean but he had to be creative to win the prank war.

All three of them gasped when they saw Mr. Stark’s eyes twitch, waiting with bated breath and silently hoping that he wouldn’t wake up.

They sagged with relief when Tony didn’t wake up, already snoring again as MJ finished the last touches of Tony’s makeover.

Peter snickered when he saw the clown makeup on Mr. Stark’s face—he felt kinda stupid for not having a clown wig but you can’t win everything.

“Pete, everything’s all set up, now we just wait,” Ned whispered, and the three plopped down on the couch, an episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine already playing.  
__

When Tony woke up he noticed two things—one, Pete and his nerd gang were watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine without him and _who the fuck was that person?_

Tony startled, realizing the fucking clown was _him._

He whipped towards the sound of laughter, eyes narrowing at Peter, “You, you did this you little heathen.”

Peter shook his head, wiping the tears from his eyes, “What—what are you talking about Mr. Stark, you’re always a clown.”

As nice as it was to see Peter all smiley and happy—the kid didn’t do that enough anymore—Tony couldn’t just let him get away with this disrespect.

“You think you’re funny, kiddie, but have your friends heard about what happened last Monday?”

Peter’s eyes widened comically, already stumbling over an apology and _no, no, Mr. Stark, I’m sorry!_

“No, we haven’t actually,” MJ raised an eyebrow, gesturing for him to continue, and why the fuck was the kid’s girlfriend kind of scary.

“Okay, Peter’s scary girlfriend,” Tony laughed at Peter’s red face, “he couldn’t find the screwdriver, right?”

Ted and scary girlfriend MJ nodded, while Peter fell to the floor, resignation written all over his face as he stared at the ceiling.

“Pete asks me where it was, and it was right in his hand,” Tony chuckled at the memory, “and he started looking for it everywhere, tripped over his backpack and—just watch the footage.”

FRIDAY had pulled up a folder titled _Spider-Baby’s Greatest Hits_, a clip of Peter tripping over his backpack on loop, the screwdriver hitting his head. Peter groaned while Ned cackled, and even MJ was smiling.

“Mr. Stark, I trusted you,” Peter grumbled, and Tony pointed to his paint covered face.

“Et tu, Petey?”  
__

A week.

Tony and Peter’s long going feud of trying to scare each other lasted a week before May and Pepper sat them down for an intervention.

Rhodey and Happy stood to the side, faces unimpressed—Peter’s latest attempt to scare Tony resulted in them being splattered with rainbow glitter and silly string.

Peter glanced nervously at May and Pepper, while Tony attempted to mask his fear of sitting in the same room with an angry May _and_ Pepper.

“Tony, this has to stop,” Pepper started, “this morning I found a cardboard cutout of Fury in the hallway—_why?”_

“Pete said the pirate was scary once,” Tony mumbled, ignoring the glare Peter sent him.

“And honey, the bathroom was filled with glitter, what the fuck were you thinking?” May questioned, an eyebrow raised as she stared at her nephew.

“Mr. Stark said glitter scared the—the bejeebies,” Peter paused, laughing while Tony looked at him with betrayal, “out of him, so I made glitter bombs.”

Rhodey sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose while Happy grumbled something that suspiciously sounded like _stupid Spider-Kid and stupid Boss always doing this shit_ but Tony wasn’t sure.

“It’s been a week, can’t you dumbasses just call it off?” Rhodey asked, somehow still looking terrifying beneath the layers of glitter.

“You know, this was the kid’s fault—he gave me a heart attack!” Tony pointed a finger at Peter.

Peter stuck his tongue out at him, “Well, you’re the one who put spiders in my room Mr. Stark.”

“Semantics, kiddo, maybe stop sleeping on the ceiling,” Tony shrugged, four identical sighs sounded in the background.

“Boss, if I have to hear about the kid whining about losing in the prank war, I swear I will quit this job.”

Everyone knew he wouldn’t—after that one time in 2003, Tony and Happy would be best friends for life.

“How about you boys just call a truce?” May suggested, but Tony and Peter heard the _stop this now, or else_ in her voice.

“Truce, Spider-Baby?” Tony offered his hand, and Peter sighed before shaking it.

“Truce, old man.”

“Fucking finally,” Rhodey muttered and everyone else in the room nodded their agreement.

“Hey wait,” Peter started, “did you dye your hair, Mr. Stark?”

Tony stared at him with confusion but nodded.

“_What?_ All those grey hairs from scaring you were my hard work!”

May and Pepper shared a look, Rhodey was looked on the verge of tears because _not this shit again_ and Happy just sighed.

“Your—your hard work, get back here you little shit!” Tony called after Peter, who was already running to the nearest wall.

Typical.

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are highly appreciated!
> 
> reviews and criticism are appreciated as well.
> 
> thank you so much for reading <3000


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